It's a Travesty

Well, the first proper trailer for next summer's Star Trek film is out, and ts terrible, the enterprise bridge doesn't have that plywood look I crave and I bet the computer won't make loud clicking noises when it tries to think. And look at the cast, I could be wrong but they haven't done what I suggested and cosmetically altered the entire cast to look 40 years younger, I mean come on, this is the 21st Century and just because some actors are dead shouldn't stop them starring. Come to think of it they didn't use my fan script and so any other must be unsuitable.

I trust like me you will all be boycotting this travesty.

I am of course kidding. Aside from one or two niggles, and considering its a trailer, some minor fanboyish continuity issues, this looks tops. It has some very nice touches, rumours of Kirk being disgraced due to his actions in the Kobiashi Maru, the Uniforms, gods the Uniforms, they are truly genius. Karl Urban and Zachary Quinto just look so much like young versions of McCoy and Spock its unbelievable. We seem to be getting huge dollops of fan service, Christopher Pike, Sarek and Amanda, the Enterprise Under Construction.

Can I take a Newborn to see it?

SO what are my niggles. Well, the bridge, looks more bridge like, but also like a wine bar in an apple store. But it is an understandable change. The other is The Enterprise herself, saucer to deflector dish she's fine, but the back is too squished and too truncated, and the big vents on the front of the nacelles look a bit duff. But really its more in the way of its not my favorite (A, Original, D, NX-01, C, B, New movie and the Enterprise J seen in an episode of Enterprise if you're interested)

So, with such minor niggles, how the hells can I not be excited.

The Name Game

As many who know me know, I have become a dad.

This naturally leads to many new, irrational fears about the universe which I will no doubt expound on at a later date. At the moment my main focus will be on names.

My wife and I spent nearly the full 9 months (Not counting hypothetical conversations in the years before) deciding on names, and I think we did well to deliberate on this for such a long time, longer than we spent making many other decisions, because this is the name our child will be stuck with until it is legally old enough to change its name. Now I made some less than serious suggestions (Optimus Prime, Minime) but in the end I am happy with what we chose, and I think our child has a name it can live with (or at least a very normal middle name should it need a fallback)

However, others are not nearly so sensible.

In the bed opposite us were a couple who, despite being give 9 months had yet to decide on a name. Come on, really, did you have something more important to do.

Worse are some of the really strange names that people come up with, most of which go to show that perhaps they may not be that suitable to be parents. There was a couple who were annoyed that they weren't allowed to call their child 4Real, and so settled for Superman.

Superman!

And of course the Man U fan who named his boy after all 11 players on their team (of course if you did that with all 10 Doctors it would be Sad, but as its football its a bit eccentric)

Of course it seems like if you are a celebrity then absurd names are mandatory, Michael Jackson still probably the worst with the absurd Prince Michael, and the absurd and unimaginative Prince Michael II.

What has bugged me is that in the 4Real case, some kid will have to grow up with that name because his parents were so stupid they couldn't even master Velcro shoes. In fact the only reason 4Real (which will give the kid some really odd initials) was refused was because our system will only allow names made up of letters, no numbers. That's the entire criteria for what some poor little tyke will be stuck with for life. What we need is something like the french system.

in France, your name has to pass official scrutiny. So no Superman here. In fact you'd also have to make a pretty good argument for Kal'El, however, Clarke would be fine. A child could grow up as a Clarke, or a Kyle, or Tony or even a Logan without too much hassle. See I'm not wanting to limit names, just take out the really stupid ones. My system has a couple of extra features.

On first stupid name, a simple No, go away and think again is presented. There will be reasons as to why the name is stupid provided for future instruction.

On second stupid name a list of suggested names will be provided as a guideline, alongside a list of unsuitable ones. Unsuitable ones will be on a red sheet of paper with UNSUITABLE written at the top to avoid confusion.

On third attempt the parents are denied the opportunity to name their child and the name is decided from a list. The parents are also earmarked for further scrutiny by child services.

To all potential parents, giving your child a dumb name is child abuse, yes Nicholas Cage or Angelina Jolie do it, but their kids will never really live in the real world, yours will have to go to a normal school with normal cruel kids in. Introducing yourself as 4real will not go down well.